Yesterday, I was brought into a meeting about how I will be taking over my co-editor’s responsibilities when she goes on maternity leave.
Let me tell you, I smiled pleasantly and agreed to much during the meeting. However, I also made it a point to say that depending on just one editor to do all the work was idiocy (I said it in a much more diplomatic way, natch). I suggested bringing in people, and not as a last resort. Bring in people to train NOW.
That was roundly ignored.
When the co-editor came to see me afterward, she apologized for bringing me into the meeting last minute (as the editorial head, I should’ve been in the meeting from the get-go), and apologized for leaving me in the lurch. I offered a smile and said:
“Co-editor, I can assure you: when it comes to me, everything will be fine.”
The co-editor gave me a look; she knows I’m unhappy and that I’ve been seeking a way out. She told me she had wanted to speak to me before I accepted the job and gently warn me about what I was getting into (no guarantee that I would’ve listened, honestly). She understands how this place is not for everyone. For now, I’m playing the waiting game—keeping my mouth shut here and keeping in contact with the company that wants to hire me. This is by far the biggest hint I’ve given about my departure to anyone at this job. When I said everything would be fine, what I meant was this: she may beat me out the door, but not by much. I don’t know that she got it in that instant, but she is smart and on the ball. If she doesn’t know (we have a mutual friend who served as a reference and could possibly let it slip), then she’ll definitely start to suspect.
Either way, patience is what’s important now. I thought I might have trouble getting to sleep last night with thoughts of something going wrong with this new job and having to endure the editorial nightmare here, but I fell asleep quickly. I’ve heard from my future boss that he wants me on his team; I’ve heard from future co-workers to just roll with the punches with HR; I’ve been told where best to park. Again: patience. Doom and gloom shouldn’t be a factor here.
When my boss brought up how heavy my workload would be in late January, I just smiled, nodded, and said that bringing in people then would definitely be something to consider. Though I know I’m going to be leaving them in a bad position, I need to do what’s right for my career and my sanity.
To end on an entirely separate note: have set up an appointment to see an RE. My primary care doctor recommended a certain practice; because of my age and our PPO, she told me do not pass go, do not collect $200—straight to the RE I should go. So here we go.